DEF CON 27 Social Engineering Village Notes

Perry Carpenter - The Aspies Guide to Social Engineering

Notes By Aryan Giri

Speaker: Perry Carpenter, Chief Evangelist & Strategy Officer at KnowBe4

Background: Autism spectrum diagnosis, degrees in religious studies and philosophy, former pastor, security awareness expert

Key Focus: Leveraging neurodiversity as a superpower in social engineering and security

The Personal Journey: From Alien to Expert

Perry Carpenter shares his deeply personal journey of discovering his place on the autism spectrum and how he transformed perceived weaknesses into professional strengths.

Core Insight: "I've always felt like an alien looking at the world and the people around them, saying 'what makes these people tick? Why do they do the things they do?'"

Diagnosis and Realization:

"About four years ago I realized... that I probably fall somewhere on the autism spectrum. I went in and got the diagnosis and then I started to share that with childhood friends and they're like 'well no duh we've known that for years' which made me feel great."

The Turning Point: Why Share This Story?

Motivation: After mentioning his diagnosis during a presentation, parents of autistic children and young adults on the spectrum approached him with gratitude, showing him the impact of sharing his story.

The Revelation Moment:

Unexpected Impact

Parents saw hope for their children's future in society and careers

Young Adult Inspiration

People in their early 20s saw possibilities for personal growth and career success

Cultural Shift

Part of growing neurodiversity movement in organizations like GCHQ and tech companies

Professional Context: "I can talk about security all day long because I can dissociate. Maybe it makes sense every now and then to mention this aspect of my life."

Asperger's Characteristics: Challenges and Superpowers

Restricted Interests

Tunnel vision and deep focus on specific subjects

Subject Matter Expertise

Ability to become world-class expert in focused areas

Pattern Recognition

Seeing connections others miss across different domains

Emotional Expression

Difficulty showing, talking about, and reflecting emotion

Social Connection

Struggles with emotional reciprocity and relationship building

Home Life Impact

Difficulty being emotionally present with family

Career Insight: "Luckily for me I was able to shift a lot of those restricted interests into the security world. If you find yourself in that kind of spectrum, you'll figure out how to use these things as almost a superpower and find competitive advantage."

The Professional Evolution Journey

Early Career: Coding at Walmart

  • Wrote email system used in all Walmart stores and clubs for 5 years
  • "The type of coder that would unplug all the lights in the office"
  • Would lose 10 hours coding feeling like 5 minutes
  • Promoted to team leader but struggled with people management

Transformation: Dale Carnegie Training

  • 12-week immersive speaking and leadership training
  • Voted "most changed person" by the end
  • Consciously threw himself into personal development
  • Learned to project emotion and connection

Dual Roles: Gartner & Pastoral Work

  • Simultaneously worked at Gartner and served as church pastor
  • Pastoral work: 40-minute talks weekly, counseling through life crises
  • Gartner: 25 hours weekly phone consulting, presenting
  • Learned to "walk through the wreckage of people's lives"

Current Role: Chief Evangelist at KnowBe4

  • C-level executive presenting worldwide
  • Works with Kevin Mitnick and other security leaders
  • Consistently top-rated speaker at Gartner (4.5/5+ ratings)
  • Author of security awareness books

Interests as Foundation: The Connection Web

Magic & Misdirection

College card tricks evolved into understanding deception principles applicable to security

Street Hypnosis

Training in Las Vegas - understanding belief casting and reinforcement cycles

Pickpocketing

Physical deception techniques with digital security parallels

Cold Reading & Mentalism

Simulated mind-reading using observation, NLP, and psychological principles

Integration Philosophy: "I've been able to grow that and weave some of that into security because when we're talking about social engineering, deception and misdirection are key."

Practical Techniques for Social Connection

Emotional Intelligence Development:

Alexithymia Management

10% of people experience "writer's block" for emotions. Use emotion wheels and lists to identify and articulate nuanced feelings beyond basic "mad/sad/happy."

Theory of Mind Practice

Consciously recognize others have different perspectives. Essential for both social connection and social engineering targeting.

Authentic Emotion Simulation

Like method acting - recall personal experiences with similar emotions rather than fake emulation. Neil Gaiman principle: "All fiction has to be as honest as you can make it."

Connection-Building Tactics:

Multiple Context Meetings

Meet someone multiple times in different locations the same day to create multiple memories and sense of longer acquaintance

Reciprocity Leverage

Understand oxytocin release from giving/receiving to build investment in relationships

Value Reflection

Identify what others appreciate and reflect that back to build connection

Communication Mastery Strategies

Message Consolidation

Shift from fact-heavy presentations to core message of 3 key points with emotional reinforcement

Intentional Modeling

Study effective speakers (TED talks, pastors) and mimic techniques that feel authentic

Emotion-Logic Balance

People decide with emotion then justify with logic. Infuse messages with emotional elements even if not naturally felt.

Truth as Seasoning

Use genuine elements to make messages credible: "Using truth as a condiment to make otherwise unconvincing narrative absolutely credible."

"I learned that people make decisions based on emotion and then backed them up with logic later on. I had to figure out how do I infuse whatever message I'm giving with emotion even if I don't necessarily feel it connected to that message."

Career Development Framework

Escape Room Approach to Career:

Branching Connections

As you master one skill, identify 3 new avenues it unlocks when combined with existing knowledge

Interest Integration

Weave together psychology, magic, misdirection, and technology into unique professional value

Progressive Masking

Develop professional personas that feel authentic while meeting situational requirements

Relationship Insight: "If you're married and your spouse is in a helping profession like a teacher, nurse, or speech pathologist, it's probably likely you're on the spectrum. We tend to attract those types of people because they want to understand and be helpful."

Ethical Framework and Professional Philosophy

Leave People Better

Ethical duty to leave every situation better than before entered. Understand what "better" means in each context.

Social Responsibility

When engaging with others, ensure they come away rewarded for the interaction

Authentic Connection

Use personal emotional memories to create genuine rather than fake emotional responses

Professional Mission: "I see myself as actually having done some pretty good for the community. I work with great guys like Eric and others, and I've been able to use my unique perspective to contribute meaningfully to security awareness."

Key Takeaways for Neurodiverse Individuals

Essential Success Strategies:

  1. Transform restricted interests into professional superpowers and competitive advantages
  2. Use intentional immersion and modeling to develop social and communication skills
  3. Develop ethical frameworks for emotional connection using authentic personal references
  4. Approach career development like an escape room - each skill unlocks new combinations
  5. Leverage pattern recognition abilities to see connections across different domains
  6. Understand that deep emotion exists even if expression is challenging - find ways to articulate it
Final Wisdom: "You want to approach life in your career like an escape room. As you learn one thing, what are maybe three avenues that that unlocks if you can combine it with all the other things that you know and are fantastic at?"

Recommended Resources:

  • "The Journal of Best Practices" - Key book in Perry's diagnosis journey
  • Neil Gaiman's writing on authenticity in communication
  • Emotion wheels and detailed emotion lists for alexithymia management
  • Chris Hadnagy's social engineering books
  • Dale Carnegie training for communication skills development